Talking
about caregiving at work can be difficult and stressful. And that’s
important because 35% of ALL employed Canadians have caring responsibilities at
home.
Dr.Zachary White is an expert in the barriers that natural caregivers face in
explaining their responsibilities at home to others, including employers. Dr.
White is an Associate Professor at Queen’s University in Charlotte, NC who has
recently made working caregivers the subject of his research. White also blogs regularly about the meaning, stress and
uncertainty of daily caring at The Unprepared Caregiver and he is a senior advisor at the Canadian caregiver support
forum, Huddol.
I
asked Dr. White what he believes are the biggest barriers to communicating
about caregiving in the workplace.
Dr.
Zachary White: In the inevitable blurring of work and home
life, caregivers must constantly negotiate the possible rewards of receiving peer
support at work while also attempting to make good judgments about how and with
whom to share their personal experiences. On the one hand,
caregivers want to openly express what is going on in their lives at home. On
the other hand, caregivers also understand the possible risks of disclosing
their caregiver experiences in the workplace. For example, with whom
should they share their experiences? Who do they not want to know? How might
colleagues view them after their disclosures? Will colleagues feel like care
responsibilities will take away from productivity and thus increase others’ workloads? How
often should natural caregivers share their care challenges, and in what format
(e.g., in person, telephone, email, text)?
I
asked Dr. White if his research showed us how we SHOULD communicate care
responsibilities at work.
Dr. White: “There is no handbook for what should be said because each situation
and employee concerns are different. However, if an employee chooses to share
his or her caregiver experiences at work, they might benefit from the ability
to control their narrative. Instead of having to respond to a question
that might arouse defensiveness ("What's wrong with you--you don't seem to
be performing like you normally do?"), proactively sharing caregiver
experiences in the workplace might allow a caregiver to provide vital context,
which might lead to greater employer understanding. A willingness
and ability to frame one's caregiver experiences as an ongoing journey, for
example, might redirect the mystery of—‘what is going on' with the
caregiver/employee to ‘how can I help to ease the pressures in my employee’s
life?’ Explaining how you are trying to integrate your care responsibilities
into your work responsibilities might also reduce uncertainty amongst peers in
the workplace. An employee need not have all of the answers here,
but merely initiating this conversation might encourage collective sense making
and problem solving. Additionally, a one-time disclosure will usually not
suffice because most caregiver experiences are chronic. Finally, a caregiver
should be prepared to think about what types of channels might be best to
communicate their experiences to others. Face-to-face disclosures might be best
for the initial disclosures of context, but email typically is the preferred
medium employees use to disclose about their caregiver experiences because it
allows for greater control and flexibility over the message. However, not all workplaces (nor employees)
are the same, so I would suggest thinking about which media you might prefer to
use to communicate given your situation and the specific culture of the
workplace.”
Without
a language to explain our experiences to others in the workplace, natural
caregiving will remain mysterious and stigmatized, negatively affecting our
empowerment and resilience.
Developing
a language that meaningfully resonates with our experiences is an essential
step toward creating and leveraging social support, connecting to others, and
explaining care experiences in ways that peers at work will understand.
This article first appeared in Caring Connections, a weekly column published by Troy Media.
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