Saturday 14 March 2015

Special Words and Deeds to Support a Caregiver's Hurting Heart

Recently, I wrote about friends who aren't sure how to support a caregiver in distress.  I talked about how difficult it is for caregivers themselves to know how anyone could help in situations that are so trying, they are almost beyond description.

This week, I came upon two examples of creative and profound support.


Today, I was chatting with a fellow caregiver about a mutual friend who is in a firestorm of family tragedy.  My friend is from a different culture and she sometimes conjures phrases to create deeper meaning than could be found in native english.  Today she said, "I just wish she (our mutual friend) was a baby again so I could scoop her up and hold her."  I found this expression so deeply compassionate and empathetic - I will use these words when I comfort anyone I care about who is trying bear the unbearable.


My friend Julie Drury is a fellow disability Mom and blogger.  Julie's young daughter Kate has Mitochondrial Disease and is currently undergoing a bone marrow transplant in hospital, after having a course of strong chemotherapy in preparation for the transplant.  Kate's older brother generously and bravely donated his bone marrow to help his sister be well.

Last week, Julie posted a photo of Kate wearing her hair in pigtails tied with red ribbons.  At first a few close friends and family began tying pigtails in their hair and sending selfies to the Drury family in hospital as a sign of caring and solidarity.  Now, the hash tag #pigtails4kate has hundreds of hits and everyone who has ever known and cared for and about the Drurys has a pigtail selfie posted to Julie's facebook page.  Even family pets are wearing red pigtails.  The Drury family will be isolated in hospital and subsequently at home for six months while Kate's immune system remains compromised.  But one thing they won't be, is alone.  #pigtails4kate

For up to date information on Kate's bone marrow transplant, visit Julie's blog at  To support Julie's family, visit: HERE.

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